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Joel’s birthday is finally over. I’ve been raving for the most part of the week. Now I’m free to rant all I want. Matapos ang isang linggo ng pagtitimpi, handa na akong magpakawala ng galit. Umuusok at naglalagablab na galit.

In my quest to share my blog all across the world wide web, I join different blog communities. In one of the communities I posted a thread titled, ‘Do snakes interest you?’ That simple. To my surprise I receive a few comments such as………..

‘I’m scared of snakes…. ‘

‘I **** snakes.’

These comments I can take, I understand that not all people share my passion for serpents. The next one, however, managed to strike my nerves. Note that I did not edit anything out except for the name. These were his exact words:

‘I’m with YOU, —-! Sheesh, I had a flickr widget on my blog with a Nature Group Pool and one day, after a year, I asked them, politely casually, not to include snakes in the Pool. Those amateur snappers went Bonkers. So nasty. I was so ‘crushed’ it took me an Entire 42 seconds to dump the bums and put up a Classy Group! They lost a TON of traffic –every day my readers clicked on those photos to look at their pics. Serves ‘em right!

And most people don’t know: snakes have salmonela on their gross skin. Easy to get sick touching those filthy things, but who would want to, you’d hafta look at ‘em. YUCK. Totally Diz-gusting. (Geez, why did I read this…now I’m going to have a nightmare, sheesh.)’

To the dimwit who posted this on that particular site, first off, you misspelled salmonella. hahaha.

Second, HOW DARE YOU CALL THEM GROSS, FILTHY, AND DISGUSTING! Did you know that snakes play a very significant role in many ecosystems around the world. Saang planeta ka ba nakatira??? Snakes benefit humans by controlling rodent populations (hallur, ever heard of the bubonic plague??? tingin ko hindi, mwahaha). Even snake venom has been used to treat various diseases such as cancer, heart disease, and hemophilia.

Third, yes, I have heard that reptiles do carry some strains of salmonella. But so do amphibians, mammals, that includes us humans (o baka naman alien ka???). Even common house pets like dogs and cats. Chickens can even carry up to 2,000+ species of salmonella. Sources of salmonella include contaminated meat, improperly cooked meat, undercooked eggs, animal feces, even raw milk or certain fertilizers and animal feeds. It is probably associated with them because they do come into contact with their ***** dahil hallur, hindi sila nakakalakad katulad mo. They can move in 4 different ways; rectilinear movement, serpentine movement, concertina movement, and sidewinding, notice walang ‘walking’ dahil wala naman silang legs (o baka hindi mo rin alam yon???). Correct me if I’m wrong [calling all herpetologists (as in scientists who study reptiles and amphibians, hindi sila manggagamot ng herpes baka kasi yun ang akala mo) please help me out here............], I once heard that there is a solution to getting salmonella from reptiles, hand washing and alcohol!! I hold (even kiss) Sedira a lot, but one thing I always do is to wash my hands afterwards. It’s so easy to wash one’s hands: water + soap + common sense lang yan, unless of course you lack the latter (turuan din kita maghugas ng kamay gusto mo???). You have more chances of getting the bacteria from improper food handling than you would from a reptile, intyendes???

Fourth, ever heard of CONSERVATION????? Why the heck do you think Steve Irwin wrestled all those crocodiles??? Did you actually think he had nothing better to do??? Did you know that some 200 species of snakes are considered threatened or endangered? The biggest threat being habitat loss resulting from human activities like logging that causes deforestation. They are hunted for their beautiful skin which we humans turn into bags, belts, wallets, etc. In some countries, they are killed for their meat which is considered a delicacy. Others hunt them for their blood which is valued for its alleged pharmaceutical effect of warming the blood of the drinker. In fact, WE ARE A THREAT TO THEM AND NOT THE OTHER WAY AROUND. And FYI, snakes do not bite humans and are harmless unless provoked.

So unless you start taking an interest in their survival, snakes may find themselves banished from our planet. Unless you start caring, baka sa books o sa pictures mo nalang sila makita.

There a lot of things I still do not know about them. In fact, I only started reading about salmonella in reptiles when I heard Mr. Ignoramus Stupidus Maximus (ginawan pa kita ng scientific name…….bonggacious da va). There a lot of species I would love to learn more about, read about, and if I’m lucky, to hold and handle. But alas, I can only drool in envy as I watch reruns of the late Steve Irwin handle the most venomous species. Whenever I go to zoos, I head straight for the serpentarium as they never fail to mesmerize me. In case you didn’t notice (my username alone screams snakes, black_mamba, duh), I LOVE SNAKES MORE THAN ANY OTHER ANIMAL ON THE PLANET!

So to the a–hole who said that, next time you feel like saying anything bad about them, think again. Or better yet, start watching more Nat Geo or Animal Planet instead of watching Paris Hilton’s **** videos. Or read more books instead of all those Playboy and Hustler magazines.

P.S. I will post pics of me & Sedira kissing, but later na as it is only 5 in the morning, I haven’t brushed my teeth, baka mahimatay siya hahaha…………..